Thursday, March 25, 2010

discouraging

So, today I'm feeling discouraged. It's day 53 of my cycle. FIFTY THREE. It has been 5 days since I finished the progesterone, and nothing has happened. I was happy though, because for the last few days, my temperature had been dropping, which seems like for sure it meant things were coming to an end, but this morning it went back up again. Not SO high up that you'd think I ovulated, just high enough to be annoying and discouraging. Most girls don't wish for their periods to come, but I feel like I constantly am. You'd THINK I'd constantly be wishing to be pregnant, but so often, after I take a million tests and know I'm NOT pregnant- I'm just in a hurry to get my period so I can try again.

Anyway, so now I'm just waiting, and hoping that maybe with Murphy's law- because I'm mentioning it and all- I'll get my period soon so we can start again. I'm REALLY hoping!

Cross your fingers for me!

(this was an entirely not entertaining and way bummer of a post. Sorry 'bout that.)


~M

2 comments:

  1. sorry to hear that! i hate how this journey has so many highs and lows, from day to day. i had a bout of this too last summer/fall. every day all i wished for was just to get my period. took lots of PG tests, never amounting to anything. my doc kept saying, "well, you never know! you could ovulate any time! constantly tracking and taking expensive OPKs.

    i'm mad at myself now ... as soon as that piece got regulated i lost perspective of that, and started getting annoyed at OTHER stuff.

    it's weird how complicated our bodies are - and such a miracle that people actually do get pregnant.

    continuing to send you good vibes!

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  2. Kate,

    Totally. The thing I think that MOST makes me mad about this cycle, is that it's the first time I took clomid, and it's the worst cycle I've had in a while. The first cycle where I haven't eventually ovulated. That just doesn't seem right!

    Anyway, thanks for the good vibes; sending 'em your way too! :)

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