You know what apparently is a risk when you're pregnant, vs. when you're not, that I had never heard of before?
You can be getting dressed in the morning, and put on your maternity pants (no buttons, zippers) and not notice until you get to work that you have put your pants on backwards.
Oops.
~M
Monday, February 28, 2011
Friday, February 25, 2011
my belly- 20 weeks 1 day- plus other things, too.
I know what you're thinking. But wait! You were just at 19 weeks 1 day on Wednesday! How is it now only two days later, yet you're a week further along? (Oh, you weren't thinking that? You didn't even notice? Well, fine!)
ANYway... we had our second anatomy scan today, and it went just swimmingly. The reason I'm now at 20 weeks 1 day, is because the hospital confirmed that based on when I ovulated, my due date is July 14th, not the 19th like my doctor originally thought. So, I am now OVER halfway there. Wow!
The girls (yep- confirmed for sure they are both for sure girls!) are doing so well. They are measuring perfectly in every way. They measure the heart, the brain, the bones, kidneys, everything! Kind of crazy. The girls were both super active today, and not wanting to sit still to be measured. I mean, why would they? They are too busy swimmin'! And flippin' around! And waving at us! (Baby A totally waved at us! Pictures to come soon- my scanner at work isn't doing the pictures justice.) There is just so much fun to be had in my uterus.
The ultrasound tech also said I had two anterior placentas- which means "in the front" of my uterus. Yes, I realize most of you know what anterior means, vs. posterior, but I had to ask. Anyway, it's totally fine, but it explains why I haven't felt them move since the one time I did on Monday. It's just an extra little cushion to absorb their movement. But I think it's only a matter of a week or so before I start feeling it more often.
Anyway, here's my bathroom pic for the week. I think I'll have to start having Ian take my picture, because these aren't great. It's super hard to get the right angle without blocking your face. I smiled this time. :)
ANYway... we had our second anatomy scan today, and it went just swimmingly. The reason I'm now at 20 weeks 1 day, is because the hospital confirmed that based on when I ovulated, my due date is July 14th, not the 19th like my doctor originally thought. So, I am now OVER halfway there. Wow!
The girls (yep- confirmed for sure they are both for sure girls!) are doing so well. They are measuring perfectly in every way. They measure the heart, the brain, the bones, kidneys, everything! Kind of crazy. The girls were both super active today, and not wanting to sit still to be measured. I mean, why would they? They are too busy swimmin'! And flippin' around! And waving at us! (Baby A totally waved at us! Pictures to come soon- my scanner at work isn't doing the pictures justice.) There is just so much fun to be had in my uterus.
The ultrasound tech also said I had two anterior placentas- which means "in the front" of my uterus. Yes, I realize most of you know what anterior means, vs. posterior, but I had to ask. Anyway, it's totally fine, but it explains why I haven't felt them move since the one time I did on Monday. It's just an extra little cushion to absorb their movement. But I think it's only a matter of a week or so before I start feeling it more often.
Anyway, here's my bathroom pic for the week. I think I'll have to start having Ian take my picture, because these aren't great. It's super hard to get the right angle without blocking your face. I smiled this time. :)
Here's a side by side comparison from last week. It kind of looks the same to me. :) (click to enlarge)
Anyway, once we scan the new ultrasound pics, I'll put those up. Have a lovely weekend everyone!
~M
Thursday, February 24, 2011
the best laid plans
So, I’ve been dreaming/planning/thinking about babies and all things associated with pregnancy pretty much since we started officially trying back in June of 2009. Different ideas about many things have come and gone; Nursery designs, diapering options, pregnancy plans, parenting styles, etc. But one thing I’ve always really wanted; was a natural birth. Maybe in a tub, or at a birthing center, most likely with a midwife and a doula. This was something I knew I always wanted, for several reasons. One; I don’t do well with medication, needles, etc. So, any chance to avoid all of that sounds great to me. Also, I like the idea of being able to be aware of my body, and really feel everything. I know, I know. Childbirth is painful, and definitely no picnic. But I really wanted to just be aware of and feel everything.
Well, so far, this whole journey has not turned out as I pictured. I always thought I’d have SOME trouble getting pregnant; but only because of irregular cycles. I didn’t think anything was actually WRONG with me, like PCOS. I thought I just had a wonky cycle. I certainly didn’t think it would take as long as it did to conceive (though I know many others wait MUCH longer); even though I read the statistics about PCOS and conceiving. I knew I could be at higher risk for miscarriage; with the PCOS and then with the Factor V, but I never thought it would actually HAPPEN. I really never wanted to have to take any medication to ovulate, and I also never wanted to do anything like an IUI. Yet, all of these things happened. I had to jump through way more hoops and compromise my “ideal” on most things in order to have what I wanted most; a baby of our own.
Through each step, I’ve been disappointed, and then finally made my peace with it; because it was how it had to be. I did have an AMAZING Reproductive Endocrinologist, Dr. Sami David, so I was truly lucky in that respect. But I did have to adjust my way of thinking of things.
Back to the “one thing I always knew I wanted”; a natural birth. Well, once again, I will have to let this dream go. There are VERY few midwives that would take a twin birth. It’s too risky. So, that’s out. Along with birthing center, and tub birth. I most likely will have to give birth in the Operating Room, because they have to be prepared to do an emergency c-section. Because of THIS, they have to automatically give me an epidural. I’ve not clarified it with my doctor, but in some of the books I’ve read, they place the epidural line, but don’t administer the drugs until absolutely necessary (if I request them or if I have to have an emergency c-section). So, I have to clarify that part with her. Also, with twins, there is slightly less than 50% chance of a c-section, because if the first baby is not head down; you can’t deliver vaginally. I really need to prepare myself mentally for this. I’m WAY more scared of a c-section than I am of a drug free delivery, for many reasons. I don’t like the idea of being sliced open; I don’t like that I can’t hold them right afterwards, and that I have to lay there being sewn up for like an hour afterwards; I don’t like that the recovery time is so much longer; etc.- the list goes on. Honestly though, I will not be taking any chances. I’m too scared to lose my babies to take any chances. So, if my doctor recommends that I do something one way, I’ll do it. She’s great, and has delivered many sets of twins vaginally. So I know she’ll do everything she can to make it happen that way. But- it could go either way, and I need to prepare myself for this.
I think it will probably be the same process I went through to come to terms with all of the things along the way that didn’t “go as planned”. I mean, life rarely goes as planned, which sometimes makes it frustrating, but also makes it thrilling.
I know that no matter how it happens, the outcome will be that I have two new members of our little Fraser family. And that’s pretty much all that matters to me.
~M
Well, so far, this whole journey has not turned out as I pictured. I always thought I’d have SOME trouble getting pregnant; but only because of irregular cycles. I didn’t think anything was actually WRONG with me, like PCOS. I thought I just had a wonky cycle. I certainly didn’t think it would take as long as it did to conceive (though I know many others wait MUCH longer); even though I read the statistics about PCOS and conceiving. I knew I could be at higher risk for miscarriage; with the PCOS and then with the Factor V, but I never thought it would actually HAPPEN. I really never wanted to have to take any medication to ovulate, and I also never wanted to do anything like an IUI. Yet, all of these things happened. I had to jump through way more hoops and compromise my “ideal” on most things in order to have what I wanted most; a baby of our own.
Through each step, I’ve been disappointed, and then finally made my peace with it; because it was how it had to be. I did have an AMAZING Reproductive Endocrinologist, Dr. Sami David, so I was truly lucky in that respect. But I did have to adjust my way of thinking of things.
Back to the “one thing I always knew I wanted”; a natural birth. Well, once again, I will have to let this dream go. There are VERY few midwives that would take a twin birth. It’s too risky. So, that’s out. Along with birthing center, and tub birth. I most likely will have to give birth in the Operating Room, because they have to be prepared to do an emergency c-section. Because of THIS, they have to automatically give me an epidural. I’ve not clarified it with my doctor, but in some of the books I’ve read, they place the epidural line, but don’t administer the drugs until absolutely necessary (if I request them or if I have to have an emergency c-section). So, I have to clarify that part with her. Also, with twins, there is slightly less than 50% chance of a c-section, because if the first baby is not head down; you can’t deliver vaginally. I really need to prepare myself mentally for this. I’m WAY more scared of a c-section than I am of a drug free delivery, for many reasons. I don’t like the idea of being sliced open; I don’t like that I can’t hold them right afterwards, and that I have to lay there being sewn up for like an hour afterwards; I don’t like that the recovery time is so much longer; etc.- the list goes on. Honestly though, I will not be taking any chances. I’m too scared to lose my babies to take any chances. So, if my doctor recommends that I do something one way, I’ll do it. She’s great, and has delivered many sets of twins vaginally. So I know she’ll do everything she can to make it happen that way. But- it could go either way, and I need to prepare myself for this.
I think it will probably be the same process I went through to come to terms with all of the things along the way that didn’t “go as planned”. I mean, life rarely goes as planned, which sometimes makes it frustrating, but also makes it thrilling.
I know that no matter how it happens, the outcome will be that I have two new members of our little Fraser family. And that’s pretty much all that matters to me.
~M
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
weekly wednesday update
How far along? 19 weeks 1 day! Halfway there, since I'll be delivering at 38 weeks!
Total weight gain/loss: Went to the doctor yesterday, and have not gained any weight in the last 3 weeks. So, I'm still up a total of four pounds. She said that she was really happy with this, and that very soon I'll probably start gaining more. I'm still really hoping to keep it around 15-18 pounds of weight gain, but we'll see! It's hard sometimes having to monitor this so closely. I wish I had been a normal weight when I got pregnant so I wouldn't have to worry about it as much, but oh well. So far it's going ok.
Stretch marks? Well...I think I found a tiny one last night. :( I know! I can feel your disappointment. I'm REALLY bummed, too. And, I feel cheated. Because you read all this stuff about how stretch marks are genetic. Well, my mom didn't get any. So, if they're not genetic, then that means I should be able to prevent it with belly cream. But apparently that didn't work either. Way annoyed. I'm going to go get some of this after work today, because it's supposed to be really good. We shall see.
***UPDATE*** Hadn't checked this morning because I was running late. Just checked, and I now have several. I am sad. :( For the stretch marks, and also, because I'm only in my 5th month. 19 weeks to go.... that's a lot of potential for way more stretch marks.
Maternity clothes? I've discovered my pajama pants, though stretchy, aren't really working anymore. They stretch far enough, but I don't like the feeling of the band around my middle, since it's not all soft and forgiving like maternity wear. I may have to go get some maternity jammie bottoms. Or something. It's important to have cozy pants.
Sleep: Well, it has been total crap the last couple of days. The night before last, I woke up at 4:30, and couldn't go back to sleep. Just wide awake. Then last night, I woke up at 2:30; same thing. Also, I was really sore- sore joints and muscles everywhere. Had to get up and go watch TV after trying to sleep for almost an hour. I am quite tired today.
Best moment this week: Feeling the babies move!! So very cool. I felt them move on Monday night. Haven't felt them move since, but now that I've had a taste, I want more! It was pretty darn cool.
Movement: See answer above. Yay, moving babies!
Food cravings: Yesterday I REALLY wanted a cheeseburger. So, I had one. It was tasty. :)
Genders: Still GIRLS! Will get one more confirmation this Friday at our second anatomy ultrasound at the hospital. Just want them to take one more look as I'm in the 20th week now, so there would be very little chance they'd be wrong at this point. Though I really have no doubt that they are girls.
Labor Signs: Nope.
Belly Button in or out? It's in.
What I miss: Still miss clear skin. And not getting completely out of breath when I climb stairs. And sleeping. I miss sleeping.
What I am looking forward to: More baby movement please! :) And my ultrasound on Friday.
Weekly Wisdom: It's kind of hard to think of wise things each week. Not that my "weekly wisdom" has really been that wise up to this point, but you know. I think one thing I'm realizing is that it's just so important to listen to your body; especially now. I think I'm pretty good at it, and I'm getting better. If I'm tired, I just let myself be tired. And it helps when you have a pretty awesome husband who helps you out all the time. :)
Milestones: Halfway point!!! 19 weeks is halfway for me, which is just so crazy!
For the size of the babies this week, my "what to expect" iphone app says that they are the size of small cantaloupes. On Babycenter, it says they are as big as bananas. So, not sure what is more accurate. They both agree though, that they each weigh about 10 ounces, and are 6 1/2 inches crown to rump (10 inches crown to heel!). I'm going to go with the banana, because Babycenter has all these pictures with the quarter next to it, so that you can see scale, and I like that. :)
Also, here's roughly what they look like right now in my belly! :)
Happy Wednesday!
~M
Total weight gain/loss: Went to the doctor yesterday, and have not gained any weight in the last 3 weeks. So, I'm still up a total of four pounds. She said that she was really happy with this, and that very soon I'll probably start gaining more. I'm still really hoping to keep it around 15-18 pounds of weight gain, but we'll see! It's hard sometimes having to monitor this so closely. I wish I had been a normal weight when I got pregnant so I wouldn't have to worry about it as much, but oh well. So far it's going ok.
Stretch marks? Well...I think I found a tiny one last night. :( I know! I can feel your disappointment. I'm REALLY bummed, too. And, I feel cheated. Because you read all this stuff about how stretch marks are genetic. Well, my mom didn't get any. So, if they're not genetic, then that means I should be able to prevent it with belly cream. But apparently that didn't work either. Way annoyed. I'm going to go get some of this after work today, because it's supposed to be really good. We shall see.
***UPDATE*** Hadn't checked this morning because I was running late. Just checked, and I now have several. I am sad. :( For the stretch marks, and also, because I'm only in my 5th month. 19 weeks to go.... that's a lot of potential for way more stretch marks.
Maternity clothes? I've discovered my pajama pants, though stretchy, aren't really working anymore. They stretch far enough, but I don't like the feeling of the band around my middle, since it's not all soft and forgiving like maternity wear. I may have to go get some maternity jammie bottoms. Or something. It's important to have cozy pants.
Sleep: Well, it has been total crap the last couple of days. The night before last, I woke up at 4:30, and couldn't go back to sleep. Just wide awake. Then last night, I woke up at 2:30; same thing. Also, I was really sore- sore joints and muscles everywhere. Had to get up and go watch TV after trying to sleep for almost an hour. I am quite tired today.
Best moment this week: Feeling the babies move!! So very cool. I felt them move on Monday night. Haven't felt them move since, but now that I've had a taste, I want more! It was pretty darn cool.
Movement: See answer above. Yay, moving babies!
Food cravings: Yesterday I REALLY wanted a cheeseburger. So, I had one. It was tasty. :)
Genders: Still GIRLS! Will get one more confirmation this Friday at our second anatomy ultrasound at the hospital. Just want them to take one more look as I'm in the 20th week now, so there would be very little chance they'd be wrong at this point. Though I really have no doubt that they are girls.
Labor Signs: Nope.
Belly Button in or out? It's in.
What I miss: Still miss clear skin. And not getting completely out of breath when I climb stairs. And sleeping. I miss sleeping.
What I am looking forward to: More baby movement please! :) And my ultrasound on Friday.
Weekly Wisdom: It's kind of hard to think of wise things each week. Not that my "weekly wisdom" has really been that wise up to this point, but you know. I think one thing I'm realizing is that it's just so important to listen to your body; especially now. I think I'm pretty good at it, and I'm getting better. If I'm tired, I just let myself be tired. And it helps when you have a pretty awesome husband who helps you out all the time. :)
Milestones: Halfway point!!! 19 weeks is halfway for me, which is just so crazy!
For the size of the babies this week, my "what to expect" iphone app says that they are the size of small cantaloupes. On Babycenter, it says they are as big as bananas. So, not sure what is more accurate. They both agree though, that they each weigh about 10 ounces, and are 6 1/2 inches crown to rump (10 inches crown to heel!). I'm going to go with the banana, because Babycenter has all these pictures with the quarter next to it, so that you can see scale, and I like that. :)
Also, here's roughly what they look like right now in my belly! :)
Happy Wednesday!~M
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
whoa...livin' on a prayer
You know, as in, the Bon Jovi song... where the line before that one is "Whoooaaaa! We're halfway there..."
Anyone?
Anyway.....
Yes- today marks the halfway point of my pregnancy! I am at 19 weeks exactly today, and since my doctor isn't going to let the pregnancy go further than 38 weeks; we're halfway there! Crazy. I honestly can't believe how fast it has gone. I know every single person says that, but it's entirely different when you're experiencing it yourself. I mean, honestly? At the beginning, it was going VERY slowly. Because I was so worried I was going to lose this pregnancy too, that I just wanted to reach a milestone. Please, let me reach the end of the first trimester, so that my risk of miscarrying again will go down. It seemed to take YEARS. And, honestly, though I can't believe I'm already at 19 weeks, sometimes time seems to still drag a bit. Because, I just worry. I don't worry excessively, or all the time, but the more I read about twin (and multiple) pregnancies and the risks, the more I think "oh, man! let's get t0 the end of this so I can see that they're safe!" Though I know that once they're out, a whole new level of worrying will kick in. :) Anyway, for now, I'm pretty darn excited to have made it to the halfway point!
Also.... last night I felt them move!!!! I was laying on the couch watching "How I Met Your Mother" (seriously; how awesome is that show??), and I made Ian pause it, because I felt something weird in my stomach. I laid there in the silence and concentrated, and it was definitely something I'd never felt before. It felt like a twitch, or a flutter. I wasn't convinced though, because it felt like it was too high up. Then, this morning REALLLLLY early, when my body had decided that 5 1/2 hours was PLENTY of sleep and that I didn't need anymore, I felt another movement. This one was different; lower down. It felt like bubbles in my stomach, and it was really crazy and awesome. It only happened when I was on my left side. So, I may not have gotten much sleep last night, but feeling that this morning was WAY worth it.
That's my Tuesday report for you! I have an OBGYN appt. today, so hopefully I'll get a quick ultrasound to see them. :) If not, I have a big ultrasound on Friday where they'll measure them, etc. Can't wait!!
~M
P.S. Oh, and if you can't get that Bon Jovi song out of your head now, sorry 'bout that. But if you're lovin' it, then you can click here and watch the whole thing. I just watched it, and WOW... that HAIR. You're welcome.
Anyone?
Anyway.....
Yes- today marks the halfway point of my pregnancy! I am at 19 weeks exactly today, and since my doctor isn't going to let the pregnancy go further than 38 weeks; we're halfway there! Crazy. I honestly can't believe how fast it has gone. I know every single person says that, but it's entirely different when you're experiencing it yourself. I mean, honestly? At the beginning, it was going VERY slowly. Because I was so worried I was going to lose this pregnancy too, that I just wanted to reach a milestone. Please, let me reach the end of the first trimester, so that my risk of miscarrying again will go down. It seemed to take YEARS. And, honestly, though I can't believe I'm already at 19 weeks, sometimes time seems to still drag a bit. Because, I just worry. I don't worry excessively, or all the time, but the more I read about twin (and multiple) pregnancies and the risks, the more I think "oh, man! let's get t0 the end of this so I can see that they're safe!" Though I know that once they're out, a whole new level of worrying will kick in. :) Anyway, for now, I'm pretty darn excited to have made it to the halfway point!
Also.... last night I felt them move!!!! I was laying on the couch watching "How I Met Your Mother" (seriously; how awesome is that show??), and I made Ian pause it, because I felt something weird in my stomach. I laid there in the silence and concentrated, and it was definitely something I'd never felt before. It felt like a twitch, or a flutter. I wasn't convinced though, because it felt like it was too high up. Then, this morning REALLLLLY early, when my body had decided that 5 1/2 hours was PLENTY of sleep and that I didn't need anymore, I felt another movement. This one was different; lower down. It felt like bubbles in my stomach, and it was really crazy and awesome. It only happened when I was on my left side. So, I may not have gotten much sleep last night, but feeling that this morning was WAY worth it.
That's my Tuesday report for you! I have an OBGYN appt. today, so hopefully I'll get a quick ultrasound to see them. :) If not, I have a big ultrasound on Friday where they'll measure them, etc. Can't wait!!
~M
P.S. Oh, and if you can't get that Bon Jovi song out of your head now, sorry 'bout that. But if you're lovin' it, then you can click here and watch the whole thing. I just watched it, and WOW... that HAIR. You're welcome.
Friday, February 18, 2011
my belly- 18 weeks, 3 days
Well, it's not fancy. It's taken at work in the restroom. Klassy, I know. Also, I forgot to smile, because I was so focused on getting it centered. Or maybe I WAS smiling, but my awesome placement of the camera is blocking it. Photographer I am not, it seems. Took lots of not centered ones first. :)
But here she is. A belly in the 19th week of a twin pregnancy. Good lord. It's gonna get a lot bigger folks. Can't say I'm not a little scared of HOW big.
Happiest of weekends to all!
~M
But here she is. A belly in the 19th week of a twin pregnancy. Good lord. It's gonna get a lot bigger folks. Can't say I'm not a little scared of HOW big.
Happiest of weekends to all!
~M
Thursday, February 17, 2011
patience
I guess I've always known I wasn't the most patient person around. I wouldn't describe myself as impatient, necessarily, but for certain things, I find it hard to wait.
I am just so happy to be pregnant, and so happy that things are going so well. It makes me excited to plan, and dream, and imagine our lives with two new family members. Ian and I are both so gung-ho about everything planning-wise so far. Because of our dear friend Wendy, we now have a TON of clothes for the girls (also, my mom went a little shopping crazy as well, and I may have purchased a few crazy adorable vintage items). We also got a breast pump from her, a jumper, a baby bouncer seat, and many more things. We purchased a double stroller for the first few months (it's a snap and go frame, and you just snap their car seats on to it) used at an AWESOME price- $75.00; which included the frame and two car seats! So, we have a good start baby gear and clothes.
We also reorganized our room to make more room on one side, so that we can fit the crib (we're going to put them in the same crib for a few months), and a chair. When we get that all set up, we'll post pics. :) It'll be our little interim nursery, until we move into a larger apartment.
I guess what I'm saying, is that we both seem to need this planning right now, because we're too EXCITED not to! Don't get me wrong; I'm not wishing away the time. I want this time when it's still just Ian and I, dreaming about our girls. Because in about 4 1/2 months, things are going to get a lot crazier!
Also, I find myself being anxious for new milestones. Like- I REALLY want to feel them move! I know it will be soon, but I'm so excited for that connection.
I think the fact that we tried to get pregnant for so long, and then had a loss, is really compounding the excitement. We've just been waiting for these two babies for SO long. We're going to love them so much when they're here; they won't know what hit them.
But, we have no choice but to be patient. It's hard, but it's not. We both know this time will go quickly, and it excites and scares us a little.
For now, I'll just keep planning and daydreaming; knowing that the time WILL fly, and they'll be here before we know it- changing our lives forever.
~M
I am just so happy to be pregnant, and so happy that things are going so well. It makes me excited to plan, and dream, and imagine our lives with two new family members. Ian and I are both so gung-ho about everything planning-wise so far. Because of our dear friend Wendy, we now have a TON of clothes for the girls (also, my mom went a little shopping crazy as well, and I may have purchased a few crazy adorable vintage items). We also got a breast pump from her, a jumper, a baby bouncer seat, and many more things. We purchased a double stroller for the first few months (it's a snap and go frame, and you just snap their car seats on to it) used at an AWESOME price- $75.00; which included the frame and two car seats! So, we have a good start baby gear and clothes.
We also reorganized our room to make more room on one side, so that we can fit the crib (we're going to put them in the same crib for a few months), and a chair. When we get that all set up, we'll post pics. :) It'll be our little interim nursery, until we move into a larger apartment.
I guess what I'm saying, is that we both seem to need this planning right now, because we're too EXCITED not to! Don't get me wrong; I'm not wishing away the time. I want this time when it's still just Ian and I, dreaming about our girls. Because in about 4 1/2 months, things are going to get a lot crazier!
Also, I find myself being anxious for new milestones. Like- I REALLY want to feel them move! I know it will be soon, but I'm so excited for that connection.
I think the fact that we tried to get pregnant for so long, and then had a loss, is really compounding the excitement. We've just been waiting for these two babies for SO long. We're going to love them so much when they're here; they won't know what hit them.
But, we have no choice but to be patient. It's hard, but it's not. We both know this time will go quickly, and it excites and scares us a little.
For now, I'll just keep planning and daydreaming; knowing that the time WILL fly, and they'll be here before we know it- changing our lives forever.
~M
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