Having a gigantic belly is something I’m quite aware of. There isn’t really any part of the day where I’m surprised to look down and see the basketball sized bump under my shirt. And for the most part, people have been very nice about the fact that the bump just keeps getting bigger and bigger. In fact, I read other blogs or hear other people’s stories about how people are always commenting on how big they are, and up until a few weeks ago, I thought I was one of the lucky ones that was going to escape people’s comments.
I was wrong.
Now, I haven’t had too many yet; but they’re starting to escalate. And since I look like a full term pregnant lady (women with twins generally measure 8 weeks ahead of those having one), I assume once I PASS looking full term, and just ginormous, the comments will continue to happen.
Some people (these are people I know- not strangers) just keep saying “Wow, you just keep getting bigger and bigger” or “wow, you’re just huge!”, every time I see them. Ok, yes. This might be true. But so far this is only women friends saying this to me. Now, ladies. Even though I’m pregnant, (and as I mentioned before, it’s a given that I’ll get bigger), when have you EVER wanted someone to say “wow! You’re big!” to you? Maybe you don’t care if you were already petite to begin with, but if you’re ever someone who has struggled with body image, having someone say “Holy crap! You’re huge!” doesn’t really feel good. Yes, I know it’s hard not to comment. But couldn’t you say something like, “Those babies sure are growing!” or “what a lovely belly!” or SOMEthing?
Now, as far as the comments from strangers, I’ve only had two official ones. I HAVE, however, had lots of people blatantly stare; and not look away for a long time. The first comment was a gentleman visiting our office. I was seating him in a conference room, and he asked when I was due. I gave my standard response, “Around the end of June, with twins.” I have to add the “with twins” part, so that people realize why I already look like I’m going to pop. His response? “Oh, with twins. Well, that makes sense. I was going to say, ‘End of June? But you’re already so big!’ but now that I know it’s twins, that makes sense.” Um, was it really necessary to tell me what rude thing you were GOING to say?
And finally, I had a very “New York” rude comment this morning on my way out of Grand Central Station. This guy with a very thick New York accent saw me walking down the street and as he passed me he LOUDLY said “Whoa! That HAS to be twins! Whoa!” and just kept walking by, like he wasn’t saying it to me, just generally commenting. Nice.
Sigh. I know that some people just can’t help it. And most of the time, I honestly don’t care. But I just wish that sometimes people would think about what they’re saying, BEFORE they say it. I’m not saying you have to ignore the fact that it looks like I’m smuggling a watermelon, but you know, try to be nice about it.
~M
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